Hydra Gaming Club - Blood Bowl League 2012


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Coach Games and Results


Key:
Greyed Team/Coach names indicate play with an unpainted team.
Asterisked Team/Coach names indicate play against an unpainted team.

Flash
HGC-BBL Commissioner

Howdy sports fans, we’re back once again, this with a post-match report on last night’s five score thriller between the Rockets and the Burning Blades.

Having wildly underestimated the strength of the opposition and the inducements at their disposal, the relatively new Blades team arrived at the venue far too late to employ the services of a star player, Slibli having a prior engagement.

However, a quick trawl through the local alehouses by the coach saw him quickly dispose of 500k by taking on the services of a couple of unemployed bloodweiser babes, a self-proclaimed “Brilliant Coach” and finally a shading looking man in a battered hat who claimed to be a Wizard. He also promised an armoury of “special” tactics for use in the match.

Finally, just as the teams were warming up a crazed Orc burst into the dugout, claiming to be a “Fan” of anyone who wanted to “smash sum ‘umie skullz in”.

Opting to substitute on the enthusiastic green skin for an un-blooded skink, the Blades set up in glorious weather and prepared to resist the legendary offensive skills of the Rockets......

Straight from the kick, the Rockets penetrated the heart of the Blades’ defence putting several men into receiving positions, before collecting the ball and moving it up to the line of scrimmage. The blades front line, shook off the dirt before standing up and pushing back against the opposition. Their defensive backs took up marking positions, before Saurus Gar’Nek, playing without his helmet for the third game in a row, uttered a mighty below before running the width of the pitch to smash the Rockets’ star catcher into the ground and then into the injured box for the rest of the match.

The skinks then moved to outflank the human line before the “Wizard” nudged the Lizard’s coach and pointed to an uneven patch of turf beneath the feet of the opposing thrower. Gleefully he depressed a hidden leaver and suddenly the unsuspecting ball handler was flung into the air before landing some fifty feet away in an unconscious heap. The ball scattered further into the backfield as the thrower was carried off for some attention by the magic sponge.

Rocked by this set back, the Rocket’s hastily reformulated their strategy scurrying to protect the ball from the oncoming lizards. The following turn saw a pair of skinks get ahold of the ball in the opponents half but they were unable to capitalise on it. At the other end of the pitch, the human receivers finally escaped the attentions of the Kroxigor’s prehensile tail putting themselves in receiving positions. More jostling on the LOS proved inconclusive but the rockets made their experience count, and ¾ of the way through the first half a completed pass led to a turn 6 touch down.

With two turns to make possession count, the Blades took advantage of a poor kick to hand position to skink in a forward position. A classic side-line half cage saw the lizards smuggle the ball down the right hand channel and convert a two turn play on the stroke of halftime.

Half time score 1-1..... To be continued.

Receiving in the second half, the Blades intended to hold onto the ball for a few turns before scoring and leaving little chance for a return score. However the opposing coach called a blitz, catching the lizards on their tails. Failing to handle the ball during the ensuing panic, the shocked backfield skinks were easy pickings, and the rockets scooped up the ball to score with only one turn on the clock. Disaster 1-2!

Not planing the make the same mistake again, the lizards set up to receive more cautiously, knowing they needed to score in this drive to have any chance of pulling the game back.

Deploying a screen in front of the saurus ball carrier, who again received the ball after some more shocking kicking from the Rockets, the blades pushed left looking for a weakness in the Human line. Drawing the suprisingly agile Ogre into the melee, the lizards them used their pace to switch the play, quickly forcing a way through on the right hand side. Before the humans could react properly, the safeties were shovelled aside by the kroxigor and allowed the aptly named Zpeer Takl to blitz his remaining marker out of the way and go for it to score at the mid-half mark. 2-2, Game on!

Confident now that they could hold out for the remaining minutes of the match, the Lizards set up on defence for the final time. However, wayward kicking again dominated the play. This time a Skink fluffing the ball back into his own half, setting up the Humans with ball in hand and a simple four turn push down one flank, against a now depleted opposition led to the winning score in the dying seconds of the game.

Final result:

Burning Blades 2 – 3 Rockets

(Both teams fully paited)

ps. That was an awesome game of bloodbowl, tight tactical and containing just the right amount of hideous luck and random mayhem for both sides to make it a fair outcome.

Well it was the opening day of the season for the Wine Lovin Sociopaths and they got off to a great start with a double header against local favourites 'The Brettonian Bolts', quickly followed (after suitable liquid refreshment) by a game against the 'Wall of Flesh'.

The opening game started off well with some early armour breaks but unfortunately no one would stay down. It all started going wrong when two blockers slipped on banana peels when attempting to block (probably placed there by the Brettonian supporters) and one managed to injure himself in the process. This gave the Bolts the chance to break through for a touchdown. Hiric, the dwarf slayer (now known as Hiric Headsmasher) decided to show everyone else how it was done and started smashing heads, badly hurting the Bolts Ogre and killing one of their Throwers whilst smashing another Human for fun. This looked all for nought as the Bolts received in the second half and looked set to get a second touch down. They set up and blitzed successfully down the flank and looked set to score. Their coach had obviously forgotten the hired wizard that the Sociopaths had bribed with wine before the match though and a bolt of lightning struck down from the heavens and knocked out their thrower. This left a huge hole in the backfield which the Sociopaths ran down and scored.
It was all tense with 4 turns left to play, although a riot at kickoff made it just 3 turns. The Bolts blitzed successfully again and it didn’t look like the Sociopaths could stop them. The lack of turns made it a tough throw though and although the strong arm thrower managed to accurately throw it the catcher on the opposite touchline couldn’t hold onto the ball and it ended up a 1-1 draw. (Dwarves fully painted)

The Sociopaths quickly headed back to the changing room to dunk themselves in barrels of red wine (well known for its healing properties) before running out to face a brand new coach from the far flung region of the Moutains of Mourn with his attendant Ogres. Things started off well for the Sociopaths who started mincing through the Ogres attendant snotlings, special mention goes to Gargrim (now known as Gargrim Snotlingkiller) for breaking numerous bones). Hiric Headsmasher also continued his blistering run of form by breaking the neck of one of the Ogres early on (not that having a broken neck should affect an ogre much). Argi the dwarf runner scored an early touchdown and this was soon followed by two more from captain Thogrim Ballbreaker and Snori the other runner. The Ogres soon abandoned any chance of winning the game and just started trying to smash up the hardy dwarves – with the main injury being to vice-Captain Argon (the not blessed) who suffered a smashed hand which the apothecary ran on to heal, but upon reaching the prone dwarf he realised he had brought the wrong rucksack and this one only contained poisoned nightshade – so the poor Argon had to keep his smashed hand as the only other option was death! At the end of the game it was 3-0 to the Dwarves but unfortunately poor Argon has now been relegated to the role of assistant coach to pass on his words of wisdom when a new Blitzer can be found. (Dwarves fully painted)

This week has seen some phenomenal games Blood Bowl fans. Second placed Lizardmen team, Sotek's Burning Blades, took on the veteran Helmgart Rockets human team in their inaugural 2012 season game. While the Blades are a new team for this season, they've been putting themselves about and have the nucleus of a formidable team. Taking the Rockets close but falling short 3-2, their close defeat earning them a point. Putting them level with the Terrors however the Elves maintain the summit of the league due to having played fewer games!

Meanwhile the Scythes liked the look of the local beef and stepped out for a bite to eat. However it appears they insulted the Bullhard's team coach who promptly challenged the crypt dwelling Counts to a Blood Bowl match. Those haughty Vamps don't back down from anyone and happily got stuck into the hairy beasts. They put up a good fight but came up just short, perhaps learning a measure of respect for the horny ones. A narrow 2-1 victory was their reward and gave the Bullhards their first victory of the season pushing them up to ninth.

Perhaps the shock result of the week is the emergence of the Wine Loving Sociopaths. New and eager to the league they put in two impressive games in one night! The first against the Brettonian Bolts resulted in a closely contested draw 1-1. Unsatisfied the Dwarves took to the pitch again against the newly formed Ogre team the Wall of Flesh. Possibly it was the wine, possibly it was the Ogres short attention spans but either way against the odds the Dwarves managed the first major victory of the season running home a 3-0 victory. A dominant and formidable display that's seen them rise to a lofty third position in the table. Surely the team to watch.

This league update has been brought to you courtesy of SPIKE 'for all your sporting apparel, with added spikey bitz!

I've just been passed our latest results Blood Bowl fans!

A bruising stalemate between the oldest rivals in the league. No quarter given and none taken. A large raucous crowd showed up and the derby atmosphere certainly favoured the Rockets. Who after winning the toss elected to receive. Early doors their token Ogre messed up his block and went down in a heap with the opposing Troll. A mistake he never recovered from as he was later knocked out and spent the rest of the game nursing his sore head. Then after a bit of back and forth blocking the Rockets eventually opened up a gap down the centre of the Fists line. Quick as a lick the Veteran Quarterback, Ironhart, made a quick pass to a waiting catcher who made through the gap to his waiting counterpart who made a run for the endzone. However he was clearly taking his time basking in the adulation of the crowd as his team got punted about by the Orcs. Isaak "The Doctor" Reinhardt wasn't impressed though and made it clear by several repeated vulgar gestures what would happen if he didn't get his act together and score. Needless to say that boy Helms has never ran so fast in his life...

Little more happened in the first half and so at one-nil down the fearsome Orkland Fists set-up to receive. Revealing a hidden chainsaw amongst their ranks they gleefully battered the line men on touchline. Seeing little joy in their early blocking game they brought forth the saw. The resultant mess made of the lineman almost killed him but the Rockets quickly brought forth their apothecary who just about managed to stitch up the mess. The Rockets quickly counter attacked the exposed chainsaw Orc but failed to take him out. The Fists made slow headway, but shifting from one wide zone to the other they started to wear the Rockets defence down knocking out linemen and Ironhart to leave them exposed. Reinhardt's boys made one last ditch attempt to stop the Orc score with a smart blitz on the exposed thrower who kept his feet only for a return block from the Rockets Frenzied blitzer who's first block failed to put the Orc down but the follow up, against the odds in a sea of green, managed to put the thrower on his tail. The ball bounced about the clustered line and eventually fell favourably for the Orcs.

There were however too few humans to either retrieve the ball or stop the Orcs from snatching it up themselves. Allowing the Fists to follow through, knocking aside the remaining defenders and run home the ball. Leaving no time for the humans to score they shamefully performed a blatant foul seeing one of their blitzers sent to box.

Rockets v Fists : 1-1



This league update has been brought to you courtesy of SPIKE 'for all your sporting apparel, with added spikey bitz!

Highlights from this weekends Southern Mash-up -

First match saw the new up and coming Shortrounds take on the newly stated Oakleaf Blades.
The Oakleaf's had taken on a lot of new blood since last season and thanks to the surprising violent attitudes of the Halflings, most of that blood was spilt all over the astrogranite.
Final score was 2-1 to the Shortrounds after causing an impressive 3 casualties to 0.

Next up, the Barbarians took on the ample Wall of Flesh. The Ogres caused quite a bit of damage on the pitch with 4 casualties to 1, but the drunken Northmen managed to get it done with the score being 2-0 to the Barbarians at the final whistle.

The Barbarians managed to round up a few wannabe fans from the crowd to pad out the team after the pounding from the Wall, ready for the third and final game against one of the Bookies favourites - The Deadites.
There were no real surprises for this game - The Deadites are a very strong (smelling) team and the Barbarians should have taken time to recover from the last brawl, but it;s hard to turn down a massive bearded drunkard when they want to play Blood Bowl.
The Norsemen were more interested in seeing how many holes they could poke in the zombies and managed an impressive 4 casualties to 1, but completely ignored the ball allowing the Deadites to win 2-0.

Good afternoon sports fans, we're back with a report from one of last night's clashes, which saw current second place team, Sotek's Burning Blades face off against another more experienced team - the Fists.

The Blades kicked off in the first half, and a friendly bounce saw the ball land almost on the halfway line, after a few turns jostling, the lizards were able to gain possession and switch the play to the other side of the pitch, stretching the Orc line.

The Fists back peddled rapidly, blitzing the skink ball carrier and knocking the ball free. They failed to account however for the unexpected agility of his attendant Saurus. He was able to perform a daring blitz move, smashing over the Orc safety picking up the ball and sprinting over the line for a dramatic turn 6 TD.

however the drive had been costly to the Blades, who had suffered greviously in the initial scramble for the ball. As they set up to kick for the second time in the half, they were 3 players light including a dead skink and a badly hurt sink and Saurus.

Sensing that worse was to come, Coach Fitz had resisted the temptation to send his medical team out so early in the match.

The end of the first half saw the Fists exploit the defensive weakness created by a lack of players and score in two turns with a relative passing play over the line of scrimmage.

Half time score 1-1

Lining up for the second half, the blades were still 3 men light, but with the ball in hand and a wizard on the bench they were confident of securing at least one more score. Another nasty kick, this time from the orcs, saw the ball end up again close to the halfway line, but the lizards were able to retain the possession, draw in the orcs, and switch the play to the far side. However by now they were 2 more men light, and really struggling to protect the ball and compete on the line.

A separate drive saw a skink and Saurus again break down the right, but this time with more uncommitted defenders available, the Fists soon smothered the ball, turning it over and looking to return for a final score in the last two turns.

Fortunately the kroxigor chose to wake up at this point, shaking off his boneheadedness to make a couple of blitzes and marking the orc's fastest player - the goblin. This left the orcs unable to get over the line as the clock ticked down.

Final score Blades 1 - 1 Fists (1-6 casualties )

Special mention must go to the groundsmen for doing such a crap job. At least 3 players failed to make rerolled GFI attempts in the first half alone, one leading to a career threatening injury.

In the post match, coach Fitz was brutal, firing an agility impaired skink, and then also having to replace his deceased and most experienced player.

Tough game rob, but enjoyed it tactically. Given your armour rolls I'm pretty pleased to have come away with the draw...!

Ps both teams fully painted.

Good evening sports fans, we're back with a report on tonight's top of the table challenge match between Sotek's Burning Blades and the legendary Tiranoc Terrors.

The Blades entered the match as clear underdogs, earning themselves over 600 points in inducements. This allowed them to engage the services of Lizard blood bowl legend Silibili as well as a Halfling master chef and a bloodwieser babe.

The lizards won the toss and elected to receive in the first half, hoping to exploit their strength advantage and cause some early casualties. Some inconclusive skirmishes on the LOS saw the lizards fail to exploit their strength, and the elves took advantage to blitz a backfield skink before stealing the ball from under the nose of a watching saurus.

However some clumsy footwork from the catcher in question saw him fall over and spill the ball. Now on the back foot the lizards recollected the ball deep in their own half, and started to look for elves to hurt, and to make some forward progress.

A slightly shaky cage saw the elves sneak in to sack the skink holding the ball, but the saurus were able to respond and clear the elves out of the way, before the ball was smuggled wide up to the right side of the LOS.

The elves scrambled back into their own half but the lizards continued to make progress down the wing, whilst inflicting a few more knock downs on the elves including their key blitzer. In the dying seconds of their final play the lizards executed a well planned series of blocks to clear a path for the ball carrier to scramble into the endzone.

Right at the end of the half, the lizards kicked deep to the elves and set up to try to minimise the chances of a one play touchdown. Things started promisingly for the terrors as they performed a quick snap, but some over zealous blocking knocked over a saurus and prevented the play from developing.

At half time the master chef did his work, leaving the elves entirely bereft of rerolls and giving the lizards a total of 7!!

Kicking off again in the second half, the lizards took up standard deep defence against the Terrors, determined to keep it tight and resist an early score attempt by not getting drawn out of position. During the tense opening moves, the lizards were content to blitz in and out, and managed to remove a couple of scoring threats from the field without leaving gaps. In the face of sustained pressure the elf thrower elected to back off into his own half to wait for gap as the lizards pushed their line back up to the halfway line.

At this point elf players were looking a bit thin on the ground, and the lizards began to pressurise the ball carrier with a skink and saurus combo. This forced the Terrors hand. The pass was on the thrower delivered an inch perfect pass to the waiting lion warrior who shrugged off the attentions of a safety saurus to make the catch.

However as the elf tried to give him the slip and go for the score the sneaky saurus stuck his tail out and tripped him up. A nearby skink grabbed the ball before handing off to a team mate who sprinted half the length of the pitch to set up a final turn score for the lizards ending the game 2-0.

Final result Blades 2 - 0 Terrors (both teams fully painted)

GG Rob.

Not gonna pretend I'm not happy with that result, I fully expected to simply get out scored. Rob was really unlucky not to get the score on my first drive, which would have totally changed the game as I would have had to go chasing instead of being so cagey in the second half. The Hotpot was also huge - removing the rerolls from a weakened team thanks to the attentions of my blitzing Sauruses.

It just goes to show, if you ride your luck and you can punch enough elves, they won't come back.

....thank you Thrak, and now over to Hans for the sports....

Last night saw another amazing game of Blood Bowl between the up and coming Dwarf team, the Blitzkrieg Badgers and the washed up Wood Elf team - the Oakleaf Blades.
Speaking of washed up, it was a downpour last night, making ball handling all the more difficult, even for the nimble fingers of the pansy elves.
The dwarves started strong, receiving the ball and putting more than a few elves on the ground. shockingly, the first play of the game saw the Oakleaf's star Wardancer take a massive dwarf headbutt to the chest and declared dead by the ref! Luckily the team's apothocary managed to revive the Wardancer and re-enter play after a few turns rest on the bench...
The Elves were unable to stop the dwarves roll up the pitch and score, however the ELves made a good comeback and score in the last few turns of the half, and then to the crowd's amazement, an elf catcher bitch slapped a Dwarf blocker, putting him out of the game!
The second half saw less casualties, but the ball changed hands a few times until eventually the Dwarves managed to cage up and once again run the ball into the endzone for a second touchdown...

Final score 2-1 to the Blitzkrieg Badgers.

Oakleaf Blades were fully painted, the Badgers had one unpainted model.

It was a good game and Stu - despite declaring himself a rookie, played it very well and played the team as they are meant to be. Bloody Dwarves!!

A couple of games played on Saturday got the season of the Unsqeakable Horrors off the blocks.

First up they entertained the visiting Chaos Bullhards.

I this tense match the Skaven went down in the end losing 0-1 with the Bullhards killing a line rat and making another miss the next match.

However the second game saw the arrival of the Short Rounds who were duly beaten 3-0 by the Horrors, despite them killing another line rat.

Both opposition teams were fully painted, while the Skaven continue to seek a shirt sponsor.

The unsqueakable Horrors continued their patchy season with a 2-1 win over the Oakleaf blades followe by a pummelling at the hands of the wine loving sociopaths.

The stuntis won 2-0 and managed to inflict an astonishing 9 casualties on their furry foes. Another line rat died, one suffered a heavy concussion and a gutter runner was retired after receiving a smashed ankle.

Ouch, sounded like a rough game for the Horrors.

In other news, more violence ensued as the Bullhards went toe to toe with the Wall of Flesh.
After the dust had settled, the final score was 2-0 to the Bullhards and much swearing and shouts of frustration could be heard from the Ogre coaches dugout as the big guys failed to do what they were told and spent half the game standing around in confusion.
Bullhards were painted, the Wall was not.

The Rockets and the Bolts lined up today for the Human derby and with the Bolts ogre in rehab the defecit was large even with the Rockets trimming the fat. With that the Bolts managed to secure the services of 'Mighty' Zug and Helmut Wulf along with a wizard. With the Bolts storming their first few games they also brought more fans with them to the match.

The Bolts put up a brave fight even though Zug proved not so mighty and was injured straight away. But the Bolts still managed to make the Rockets sweat taking hold of the ball on defense and fumbling a long bomb to set up a TD. On the return drive the Bolts again fumbled a long bomb pass, but they knew there would be risky play. By the begining of the second half the Bolts took to the field seven to eleven and the game was already over. The Rockets managed to take the ball all the way two more times to end the game 3-0.